Well you can tell by the way I don't use woks
I'm a grillin' man. . .won't fry game cocks.
When I go out, get the grill warm,
I throw on venison and some corn.

Can't wait to bite into this game,
I'm carnivore and feel no shame.
To start those coals, here's what I've planned:
The New York Times as a firebrand.

But then I am bothered
By bees, jeez! in which I'm smothered.
Wish they'd stay in the hive, stay in the hive.

These damn pest are makin'
Me want to go a-breakin'
With a stake the hive, stake in the hive.

Argh! Argh! Argh! Argh!
Stay in the hive! Stay in the hive!
Argh! Argh! Argh! Argh!
Stay in the hive!

Well I didn't know what kind of hive--
It's killer bees. I want none to stay alive.
To pull their wings off is what I'd choose,
But that's impractical; besides, I'd lose.

So I plan to fight them this way:
I'm gonna get nuclear spray
That comes in a pressurized can.
They chew pork rinds with great elan.

I remove the cover
And the vapor starts to smother.
I'm sprayin' the hive, sprayin' the hive.
But it isn't makin'
'Em dead; to flight they're takin'.
Strayin' from hive, strayin' from hive.

Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!
Strayin' from hive, strayin' from hive!
Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!
Strayin' from hive!

They're in my nosehairs!
Somebody help me,
Somebody help me, please!

Under my mohair!
Somebody help me, please!
Strayed from the hive.

Well they've got me waylaid, and I cannot walk,
Because there's twenty in my sock.
I scream loud, but I'm ignored,
I'm feeling a bit like Al Gore.

Wish they would bite, not sting this way.
My skin looks like a bad Monet.
I've got a good hospital plan,
With New York Life; I'll need it, man.

By now I am covered
With stings and I have discovered
The venom gives me hives,
Makes me get hives.

And my skin is breakin'
Out with pustules
That are achin'.
Wish I'd stayed off the hive
Stayed off the hive.

Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!
Savin' my hide, savin' my hide
Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!
Savior arrived.

I'm goin' somewhere.
Somebody's helped me,
Somebody's helped me, yeah.
I'm goin' to care.
Somebody's helped me:
Ambulance drive.