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Song Parodies -> "Spiders In The Lavatory"
Original Song Title:
"Michael And The Slipper Tree"
Original Performer:
The Equals
Parody Song Title:
"Spiders In The Lavatory"
Parody Written by:
Merry & Pippin
The Lyrics
Remember the Equals? They did "Baby Come Back" in 1966. "Michael And The Slipper Tree" was three years later. How Peregrin knows it, he doesn't know. Merry didn't know it at all. What the original song means is anyone's guess, so we turned it into some good old fashioned toilet humour. It became a contest to see how many euphemisms we could churn out (pun). A low-bitrate mp3 of the song can be found here.
Firey
Feelings at the back of me, pressing me, urgently
Gotta find a loo quickly
Vital
I get to a toilet see, as my knees: tremble-y
Till then gotta clench and squeeze
Why, for me, a lavatory’s where down, I need to bear
‘Cus I’ve got a sewer serpent waiting there
The thing I’m see’n in my mind’s commode or privy
Time for me to go and cook some beans
Chamber
Chamber pot would do for me, said to girl, Mickey D’s
“Hand me keys for crapper please”
Righteous
Righteous then she got with me, “Purchase please, or no key”
Had to buy McCrap Cookies!
Swooned when there I found - was a drug deal goin’ down
That strife meant there’s no entry
A powder room I then tried to find
Gotta drop some friends off at the lake, yes indeed!
Number
Number two’s becoming three, guaranteed - T.N.T.
Restroom needed urgently
Water
Water closet quest at speed, mercy me, need to be
Spanning things, latrine-aly
Like to
Like to find a spare dunny, gents, you see, or ladies
Any bog would do for me
I could
I could go behind a tree, squat with glee, but you see
Worried ‘bout constab’lary
Fin’ly found a lavatory - God’s answer to my prayer
It’s an outside thunderbox but - ugghh - I don’t care!
A sting - I screamed - guess I shoulda checked under seat
Business a-stopped abrubt-ely
Spiders!
Spiders in the lavatory, slipped between, plastic seat
Baddish things arachnidy!
Spiders!
Spiders in the lavatory, webbery, devilry!
Can-pest blues now haunting me
Spiders!
Spiders pecking my jumbleys, swinging free, nippered me
Brown recluse I hope not be…
Spiders!
Spiders in the lavatory, zapped with glee, my butty
Scared the crap right outta me…
Feelings at the back of me, pressing me, urgently
Gotta find a loo quickly
Vital
I get to a toilet see, as my knees: tremble-y
Till then gotta clench and squeeze
Why, for me, a lavatory’s where down, I need to bear
‘Cus I’ve got a sewer serpent waiting there
The thing I’m see’n in my mind’s commode or privy
Time for me to go and cook some beans
Chamber
Chamber pot would do for me, said to girl, Mickey D’s
“Hand me keys for crapper please”
Righteous
Righteous then she got with me, “Purchase please, or no key”
Had to buy McCrap Cookies!
Swooned when there I found - was a drug deal goin’ down
That strife meant there’s no entry
A powder room I then tried to find
Gotta drop some friends off at the lake, yes indeed!
Number
Number two’s becoming three, guaranteed - T.N.T.
Restroom needed urgently
Water
Water closet quest at speed, mercy me, need to be
Spanning things, latrine-aly
Like to
Like to find a spare dunny, gents, you see, or ladies
Any bog would do for me
I could
I could go behind a tree, squat with glee, but you see
Worried ‘bout constab’lary
Fin’ly found a lavatory - God’s answer to my prayer
It’s an outside thunderbox but - ugghh - I don’t care!
A sting - I screamed - guess I shoulda checked under seat
Business a-stopped abrubt-ely
Spiders!
Spiders in the lavatory, slipped between, plastic seat
Baddish things arachnidy!
Spiders!
Spiders in the lavatory, webbery, devilry!
Can-pest blues now haunting me
Spiders!
Spiders pecking my jumbleys, swinging free, nippered me
Brown recluse I hope not be…
Spiders!
Spiders in the lavatory, zapped with glee, my butty
Scared the crap right outta me…
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Voting Breakdown
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| 5 | 6 | 6 | 6 |
User Comments
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Merry apologizes in advance for making ya'll listen to this OS in order to vote...
didn't know the OS and i couldn't get the link to work but you can't beat the concept of vermin in the restroom...fun read
Careful M & P, September & October are the Season for Spiders! There out there looking for mates . . .
With lines like "Water closet quest at speed", this is one seriously clever parody!
Hopefully it wasn't a Redback on the Toilet Seat...
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