Song Parodies -> "Hey Nude"

Original Song Title:

"Hey Jude"

Original Performer:

"Hey Nude"

Parody Written by:

The Lyrics

Last year, for the first time since joining Amiright, I didn't do a "Bjork Awards for the Worst in Oscar Fashion." This time... How many plaids had to be killed to make Andrea Riseborough’s dress? Ryan Gosling dressed like he thought he was going to the 1988 Grammy Awards. Riz Ahmed looked like he was auditioning for the next James Bond villain. Dwyane Wade wore a white jacket with black lapels and black buttons. He looked like he was wearing a lodge uniform. Ariana Grande is now 30, but still has a 12-year-old face, and those giant pink billows would be horrible at any age. Rita Moreno gets a pass for that dress, because she's Rita Moreno and she's still going strong at 92. But on a woman under age 80, that dress would have been ridiculous. Julianne Hough is not pregnant, but you'd never know it from that dress. But there was one takeaway from Oscar Night: On the 50th Anniversary of the Oscar Streaker, John Cena took the stage naked.

Hey, Nude:
You made it bad.
I don't care if
you are John Cena.
Remember
to cover up every part.
Then you can start
to look like a winner.

Hey, Nude:
We are afraid.
Still shell-shocked from
Will Smith's Rock-slapper.
The minute
you showed us all of your skin
you shoulda been
all in Reynolds Wrapper.

And it's not gonna leave our brain.
Hey, Nude.
The pain.
Should be tuxedo
upon your shoulders.
For well you know that it's a fool
who thinks
it's cool
to walk all around
exposing boulders.

Ah, na na na na, na na na na...

Hey, Nude.
You let us down.
Put some pants on
and maybe a sweater.
Remember
you're not statue of a god.
Cover your bod
and make it better.

Don't let it out, but put it on.
Hey, Nude:
Begone.
You need to cover up that pelvis.
For no one with that gets away
Hey, Nude
I say.
Not Gaga, nor Bjork, nor Cher, nor Elvis.

Ah, na na na na, na na na na...

Hey, Nude:
You made it bad.
I don't care if
you are John Cena.
Remember
to cover most of your skin.
Aw.
Then you'll begin
to look like a winner.
Winner.
Winner.
Winner.
Winner.
Winner.
Ahhhhhhhh...

Na, na na, na na na na...
Na na na na...
Hey, Nude!

Na, na na, na na na na...
Na na na na...
Hey, Nude!

(repeat for as long as you feel like it)

I almost went with "Don't let it out, put it on. Hey, Nude: We don apparel that's gay in the old meaning." After all, Sir Paul didn't rhyme that couplet in the original song. But then I thought of a better one, and went with it.

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Patrick - March 14, 2024 - Report this comment

My ABC station has had some problems for the past year or so. Had to watch reruns of Pawn Stars. Looks like I didn't miss much. I just noticed that the comments section allows for paragraphs. That's cool. My Brother in Law has cable, so I got to watch Oppenheimer. Decent explosion, couple of weird nude scenes. Lots of crappy backstabbing, anti-Semitic politics. So, it was authentic. My brother took his granddaughter to see Barbie. Says that the only people who really liked it were the ones too young to understand it.

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