[Verse 1: Ernie]
You say you want Martin McRichardson,
Well, you know.
We all know he's on his way.
You say you want him on Drawception,
Well, you know.
We all know he's on his way,
But instead when you want Marijn Prins,
Don't you know that Martin can kick him OUT?

[Chorus: Bert and Ernie]
He's only doing this for Bob,
McSmith,
McSmith,
McSmith.

[Verse 2: Bert]
You say you'll see that he's in Richmond,
Well, you know.
We'd all love to meet him there.
You ask him if he wants to do something,
Well, you know.
We're all dying to see him.
But if you want to see some comics that Wabuu made,
All I can tell you is, Martin, you'll have to wait.

[Chorus: Bert and Ernie]
It's just a comic made by Bob,
McSmith,
McSmith,
McSmith.

[Verse 3: Ernie]
You say you'll give Martin a dragon,
Well, you know,
He is a fan of Dragon Tales instead.
You say you're wanting to find Jim Henson,
Well, you know,
I'm just afraid he's still dead.
But if you go carrying all the Beatles albums,
Martin's not gonna make any Bert shows for you, no how,

[Chorus: Bert and Ernie]
Don't you know it's only for,
Bob, McSmith?
McSmith,
McSmith.

[Outro: Bert and Ernie]
McSmith, McSmith,
McSmith, McSmith,
McSmith, McSmith,
McSmith, MCSMITH!!!