It's Arthur Dent: he is an Earthman in a dressing gown
With Ford and Trillian and Zaphod as we know
And round the Galaxy they'll come and go
In the Heart of Gold

On the screen there is a planet that is legend'ry
And yet Ford Prefect thinks that planet is a myth
So he really starts to take the pith
Are they really here: Magrathea

Arthur Dent he has a drink that seems to be
Almost, not entirely, unlike tea
He complains: meanwhile back

On Magrathea there's an automat' defence system
It fires rockets that our heroes can see
The computer cannot help them flee
'Cause it's making tea

Arthur Dent suggests one way to stay alive:
Infinite improbabil'ty drive
Is turned on, meanwhile back

Outside the rockets become a bowl of petunias
And a really quite astounded-looking whale
And he starts swishing his massive tail
Through the windy gale

Arthur Dent, he sees the sperm whale heading planet-wards
And the petunias are similarly bound
But there's only one thought goes around
The Petunias' brain: "Not again"

Arthur Dent is still on board, for it is he
Nearly dying for a cup of tea
He sips and meanwhile back
Arthur Dent missed the escape of Trillian's mice
There beneath the Magrathean skies
Arthur De-he-hent