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Song Parodies -> "Wooden; It Be Nice"
Original Song Title:
"Wouldn't It Be Nice?"
(MP3)Original Performer:
The Beach Boys
Parody Song Title:
"Wooden; It Be Nice"
Parody Written by:
Paul Robinson
The Lyrics
Avast ye landlubbers! Here be a Pirate Parody! And a tip o'me Pirate hat to Kristof for inspirin' me brain that lay beneath it...
Wooden; it be nice, I have a peg now
'cause me leg was severed at the knee
Aye, wooden; it be nice, I'll soon be sailing
With me matey's off into the sea
Aye, we'll rape and plunder, aye, and pillage
We'll kill every native in that village
Wood, aye, it be nice, soon I'll be standing
with me peg leg I'll just need one shoe
Aye, chewin' hardtack that's as tough as leather
Drunk on rum, aye, laughin' with me crew
Sailin' ships we'll stalk and then we'll plunder
Mock their Captain then keel-haul him under
Will he drown, I wonder?
Matey's, he will sink beneath the ocean waves, aye, he'll turn blue
Scurvy blaggard; he will kick and gasp for air 'til he be through
At sea he'll be buried
Aye, sharks, they be happy
Aye, thinkin' we be nice
We'll make his crew jump ship and then we'll sink it
The filthy vermin; they'll die in the drink then
I'll dance me a jig then
Me wooden leg be nice
'cause me leg was severed at the knee
Aye, wooden; it be nice, I'll soon be sailing
With me matey's off into the sea
Aye, we'll rape and plunder, aye, and pillage
We'll kill every native in that village
Wood, aye, it be nice, soon I'll be standing
with me peg leg I'll just need one shoe
Aye, chewin' hardtack that's as tough as leather
Drunk on rum, aye, laughin' with me crew
Sailin' ships we'll stalk and then we'll plunder
Mock their Captain then keel-haul him under
Will he drown, I wonder?
Matey's, he will sink beneath the ocean waves, aye, he'll turn blue
Scurvy blaggard; he will kick and gasp for air 'til he be through
At sea he'll be buried
Aye, sharks, they be happy
Aye, thinkin' we be nice
We'll make his crew jump ship and then we'll sink it
The filthy vermin; they'll die in the drink then
I'll dance me a jig then
Me wooden leg be nice
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
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| 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 1 | 1 | 2 | ||||||||
| 5 | 29 | 29 | 28 |
User Comments
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Really good, Paul, nice job.
argghh matey...thar be a swashbucklin' good parody....and who doesn't like their swashes buckled every now and then...5s
Yarr! This be one fine piratin' parody. Let me pull some fives from my swag bag.
Avast, me hardy, yer' really hooked inter this one! A ho-ho-ho and a bottle o'5's.
BWAH HA HA! I can just imagine the Sea Captain from "The Simpsons" singing this.
Really good parody, Paul.
Shiver yer timbers with some 5's. Excellent!
Arrgghh! Thanks, Matey's ~ ~ ~
ARRR HAR HAR!!!
I thought this was going to be about a UCLA basketball coach, but well done, Paul.
I've got a "Wooden tits be nice" sketch on the drawing board from 2002 that you've just reminded me was there... this was a bit more original in concept, methinks. Nice one, Paul :-)
This be a mighty fine booty o' fun!! 555
Mac/JJ/Phil/Kristof - Thanks ~ ~ ~ JJ - No, that would be "Wooden; HE be nice"...Phil, hmmm...thinking about your idea..."sliver" me timber!!...Kristof - as I mentioned above, your parody started me thinking about "Wood" - so this parody kind of "branched" off of that initial thought...
Happy to provide lumberesque inspiration!!
Super!
Thanks, Ash!
This isn't about the old UCLA basketball coach?
Ye speak of Johnny Wooden, do ye, Michael? Nay...t'was not a pirate, but a Bruin thru & thru...
(SOTM) Speaking of pirates, did you know that Johnny Depp based his role as Captain Sparrow in "Pirates of the Caribean" on Keith Richards from the Rolling Stones and that Keith will now be playing Captain Sparrow's father in the upcoming sequel? "I can't get my wood in action" anyone?
Know 1 - The Keith Richards part was news to me! Interesting...I knew Johnny Depp had based Capt. Sparrow on Keith, though - and a mighty fine job of it he did - I really liked that movie - especially Depp's work. Thanks.
(sotm) This was silly.
Just put one on here dedicated to you. And your wood.
Scathe - Indeed it was...Thanks! Rick D - I'll have to take a look now....I haven't been around here too much of late...busy with new job and we're not allowed to use the InterNet for personal stuff except before & after work hours and lunch...(I usually like to eat some food during that time, so that pretty much eliminates that time period).... let's see, the 9th...that would be today's entry...cool...
Rick - Well, unless I'm the "Gutter Guy" (and perhaps I well could be...)I'm thinking you posted something TODAY that will show up tomorrow...I love surprises, anyway...so I'll be looking in tomorrow. I just posted my first number in a week...dipping back into the 60's for a little tune that should be up on Monday morning as well...
No, it's tomorrow. I'll give you a hint. Don't be "Blue" about it.
Rick - Do I sense a "Joni Mitchell" number about to make an "amiright" appearance here...?...now I'm REALLY curious...I'll be checking in tomorrow to see what it could be...
(SOTM) Gives new meaning to the expression 'waking up with wood'. 555
Agrimorfee - I guess that could be "double-wood" then...thanks!
(SOTM) Ye be entertainin'. ARR.
Thank ye, Jake...
Something tells me to expect a Johnny DD parody with the same title but entirely different subject matter. (Can you pirate pirates?) Fave lines: "Will he drown, I wonder?" and "Me wooden leg be nice." Nice work, Matey.
So this isn't about the UCLA bas-- just kiddin' me hearty. I'll just parrot everyone else and say it be well done ARRR.
Spaff - Arrgghh...matey - ye may just be right...Claude - Waaakkk! Pauly likes yer (humorous) cracks, sir...
And here I was just taking a pi-rat-es class for my well being and this pops up!
No one told me this parody be rated ARRRRRGGGGHHH!!! Very clever, my lad, and may you be promoted to Captain for this. I wonder if you'll do a Star Trek parody next and make fun of another captain. Here be me fives to give to ya!
Jeff - Aye, 'tis said keel-hauling a wussy Merchant Sea Captain or foppish British Admiral will build ye up...Chris...Actually, I do have some that deal with Star Trek & a few Captains. Capt. Kirk is dealt with in my parody of "The Wanderer" (can't remember the parody title right now) and also in "Captain's Kirk's Strange Crew" to Cream's "Strrange Brew". The current Star Trek, "Enterprise is parodied in a parody of the Red Hot Chili Peppers "This Is The Place", called "They're Lost In Space". Thanks!
Arrgghh, ye lubber Paul! Wooden it be nice to get some fives! And pieces of eight! Good job.
(SOTM) ARRHH ARRHH ARRHH ARRHH ARRHH !
SOTM--Hilarious, Paul!!
Per/JD/Arwen - Arrgghhh! Thanks, matey's...arhh...shiver me liver...
Paul I sat on a committee once that was drafting an international piracy treaty and at the first meeting several chaps came in cracking jokes about their wooden legs/ parrots/eye patches etc.....was very funny... it really gets people going... see above comments!!!......
Aye, Martha...I'll be saying this now...I be planning yet another "Pirate" parody...I'll be running it up me mast here soon...
(SOTM) Pirates are just inherently funny aren't they - nice one Paul
Yes, Stu...it must be all that yo-heave-ho-ing...or something...Thanks..
Paul, I just wanted to re-visit this parody and commend you for your Polly (wants a cracker)/Pauly (Pavillion) pun. And add that your parody and some of the other pirate parodies on amiright are certainly a tribute to Robert Louis Stevenson, who created Long John Silver, the prototype of the peg leg pirate.
Yaaar a good parody writer says I, or I be a barnacle's uncle. Pillage that village, matey!!
(SOTM) Three wooden nickels!
2nz & Tim - Thanks!
(SOTM) I thought it was going to be about a different appendage... ;-)
(SOTM) See previous comment...still grrreat!
Mer - such a dirty, dirty mind...Kristof - thanks again...
555, fantastic - I very much enjoyed it. Arrr!
Teensabre - Thank ye, thank ye...Arrr! And perhaps ye will thank me more, for there be ANOTHER Pirate parody springing up, mayhaps at sunrise of the 'morrow (Thursday, Feb. 10th)... JJ - don't know how I missed ye compliment...but I do thank ye...surely I do...
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