Who's tweetin' bout is fun for the airwaves?
Falling from fame, inciting a scare.
Who's heading down to live in a stable?
Ev'ryone knows what's trending.

Whose gripping gown's too sleek and not pretty?
Pride in the baby-bump that we see.
Who's feelin' proud no matter what's showin'?
Ev'ryone knows what's trending.

What's trending before our eyes:
Chat trash that is bound to rise.
What's trending can bring surprise
And stun the crowds (and stun the crowds),
And stun the crowds (and stun the crowds).


Transcending our boring lives,
Chat trash that has viralized.
What's trending has zing we prize
And love to spout (and love to spout),
And love to spout (and love to spout).

Who's tipping cows? Who's pleadin' for pity?
Writhin' from ev'ry bloody disease.
Who's preachin' 'bout a rapturous omen?
Ev'ryone knows what's trending.

Whose lippy mouth is piquin' the critics,
Whinin' at ev'ry smudgy critique?
Who's freakin' out as laughter is growin'?
Ev'ryone knows what's trending.

Who's flipping out the geeks on committees,
Chidin' the very budget we need?
Who's leakin' out the plans that were stolen?
Ev'ryone knows what's trending.

Who's stripping clowns that streak through the city,
Rilin' the edgy thugs on the street?
Who's teachin' scouts what crafts are verboten?
Ev'ryone knows what's trending.

Who's scripting out the streamin' so gritty?
Typin' the heady rubbish we read...