Some guys try hard to meet a woman,
Risking brawls with thugs for just one chance,
Using bad lines and choosing good wines,
Doin' things conducive to romance.

You hear your cousin has a grand friend,
Seeking beaus with charm and in demand.
Though its so sudden, she seems outstandin',
Till you are called to clutch her hand.

Man-sized, her hands,
Big mitts, too large, they'll wring you,
And when in charge, they'll numb you,
Her frightful hold, unholy.

Man-sized, her hands,
Big-bones, no churl would covet.
Mean grip could maul and crush a can.
Man-sized, her hands.

Man-sized, her hands,
You feel so girlish clutchin'.
Weak fists, you haul your butt to scram.
Man-sized, her hands.