The Prince of Darkness did extend
An invitation to attend
A pit of lava with flames leaping
Where tormented souls were weeping
And the vision of the agony and pain
I retain
My journey to Inferno

Through darkened halls I walk alone
Voices of the tortured moan
Eternal concentration camp
I wear a collar rusty, cold and damp
And then my eyes were stabbed and I nearly lost my sight
Imps lunged to smite
A piercing scream--of violence

Midst the naked throng I saw
Princes and paupers beaten raw
From scabs and bruises pus streaming
Blades of vengeance swords were glistening
While the saints above cool water may not share
A chasm there
No one's allowed to cross it

"Prince", said I, "May I please go?"
As cancer eats away my nose
"Hear my plea for I beseech you"
A thousand others screech, too
But our words like bloody droplets fell
And then the depths of hell went silent

And the people bowed and prayed
For a glass of lemonade
All were dressed in black for mourning
As a lake of fire was forming
Heed not the words of the prophets and you are bound to fall
For Lucifer's call
Next year I think I'll stay--in Kansas!