Forgot to add SFX: listen to this #1 - LOTR Helm's Deep snorks and squawks
listen to this #2 Manhattan mid-town street noises

LL: I enjoyed the parody very much and have to add that it was much better than the show (but then again, so was fingernails on a blackboard :) ). J/k, but it wasn't my cup of tea. I would have given you 6 x 5s, but I had to deduct three of them because you reminded of that dang show, after not having thought of it for decades!

I don't know from orcs, but this is very well paced and I have a slight disagreement...about no one could talk to an orc, but dork...I think Mork, of Mork and Mindy fame, could have...I'm surprised you didn't rhyme him in..

I'm happy to see this entry in the LOTR parody ranks. Well done. great rhymes throughout. Loved all of the references and characters you managed to fit in too. Your final stanza made me think of a much older parody by an author I don't know, but the parody was 'NEW ORCS' to Sinatra's 'NEW YORK' :c).

We used to make chocolate orcs. They were tastly. I liked the goblins yakity-yaking and packity-packing; sort of a bit of onamonapia there...

Thanks, guys. I really appreciate you 'usual suspects' who regularly check out my work. Nice to have a small but quality following. Hint: Check in tomorrow.

@ Peregrin Yeah, Mr Ed was formulaic and silly; sorry to remind you - but probably no worse than the inane 'Gilligan's Island' for example (loved by millions). Alan Young (Wilbur Post) did better with kid's shows.

The series was of note for some rare guest appearances, in particular Mae West (a friend of the director's) and Clint Eastwood, both playing themselves. As it was set in LA, they could be worked into the script as neighbors. It's not every day you see Clint get owned by a horse.

@ AFW: I thought of Mork talking to the orcs, but didn't know the character well enough to know if it would work. I never watched that show, though I admire Robin Williams greatly. Rhymes for orc are not that easy and I just about exhausted them. I used walk and cork twice (bad form), and overlooked 'squawk' and 'snork'. The only other unused ones I could think of were 'quark' and 'auk'.

@ Glen: Thanks. I hope it's not the last. In hindsight I think the references needed a little more polish, e.g. Subs. 'When Gimli swings their way' for 'When Gandalf wends their way' would have kept that formidable pair together. Anyhow, one wends one's own way, wends not one? Another couplet I'd like to change, in order to work in another character:
'Bold Aragorn our future king
Fair Evenstar will wed'

@ 'Merrily': 'Orc's back on the menu, boys!' Blackberry blood would have been a nice touch. Umm, what's an 'onamonapia '- am I missing something? Did you mean 'onomatopeia'?

I was more expecting a "whale" of a parody, but the wordplay and internal rhyming here were "killer"! -- and nice shout-out to Merry. ;-D   So even though the whole LOTR genre leaves me LOTR (Left Out in The Rain), 5s for a bouncy, jouncy jingle.

Thanks, Tommy. It wasn't perfect, but effective enough. If it's real animals you want, check in tomorrow, when I am extremely cruel to one.

I thought it was onamona-something with a t also, but when I googled it to make sure of the spelling that was the official one they gave me! Blasted internet!

I didn't fully appreciate this one the first time around, Lifeliver, then I noted all the comments. On second reading -- 3X5's

LL, please tell me that the ref to Orca didn't sink to the bottom of the ocean... I don't care for animal cruelty, thanks; I'm an animal-lover, as you can tell by my nick -- and by some of my parodies. (heh! heh! ;)

For the record, it's "onomatopoeia".

@ Merry: Don't blast the Net, blast Google. Or blast yourself for using them.
dictionary.com and others will check for proper spelling and offer close matches if your spelling is incorrect.

@ TT: Yes, I got the ref to your fellow ancient mariner - hence, 'real animals'. Your puns come too thick and fast to acknowledge them all. Re. onomatopoeia, that's the way I was taught it, but I thought I was giving American sp., cf encyclopedia/encyclopaedia. However, I'm prepared to stand corrected.

@ Lenny: much appreciate your reappraisal, but first impressions may be the best, lol. With the adjustments mentioned above, it could have been better.