(Crowds of LGBTQ People:)
You know, the gay marriage rulin' is a-
Comin' down the pike,
Oh, please get it right, Supremes!
We know the gay marriage rulin' is a-
Comin' down the pike,
I wish I knew what Clarence Thomas dreams!

(Supreme Court Justices in closed-door deliberations):

(Sonia Sotomayor:)
Does anybody have an extra tampon?

(John Roberts:)
Could we just focus on settled law!?

(Clarence Thomas:)
Who left this pubic hair on my Coke can!?

(Stephen Breyer:)
Maybe you'd like to get a blow-job from my cross-cut saw!

(Church Ladies outside picketing:)
Oh, Lord, the gay lesbo weddings are an-
Noying us,
Why not establish a new theocracy?

(Sarah Palin:)
We could be Christian...

(John McCain:)
Or Catholic!

(George W. Bush:)
Or Episcopalian!

(Barack Obama:)
Or we could see...

(Church Ladies:)
Jesus Christie!
Heaven strike thee if it should be!

(Barack Obama:)
Hopey-changey...

(Church Ladies:)
Somethin' so Obama-national...

(Barack Obama:)
From D.C.!

(Crowd of Assorted Comedians, Pundits and Celebrities:)
Oh, no! The gay married couples are a-
Buyin' up the street,
Oh, maybe they'll move next door!
Oh, whoa! The cross-dressin' couple is a-
Movin' in next week,
They kind of look like Al and Tipper Gore!

(Neil Patrick Harris:)
I got "Alito" secret crush on Justice Ginsburg...

(Ellen DeGeneres:)
And Kennedy is so smokin' hot!

(John Waters:)
I get the feeling Souter is neuter...

(Rachel Maddow:)
Although Scalia's a conservative, he smells like pot!

(Barney Frank:)
Yo-ho! The gay marriage ruling ith a-
Coming down,
We're watching clothlee on clothed-thircuit TV!
We love the rude interruptionth and the
Thyarp rejoinderth,
But thith could mean...
Homothexual...
Vic-to-ry!

(A Majority of the American People:)
Mofo's, the swell pro-gay activists are comin'!
And know the swell tide of justice keeps a-runnin'!
So all you LGBTQ's let's keep
Marchin' until
We reach e-qua-li-ty!