Fittin’ room for gownin’ fun…it’s not fittin’ coz these stonkin’ plums
Squeezin’ my hips right in…now they’re gettin’ in the way again…yeah

I’m sittin’ in the frock here today…watchin’ the bride bawl away
Ooh, I’m just sittin’ in the frock here today…feelin’ prime

I’m glad I’m not a gorger…wouldn’t have a frisky day
But I’ve had wires through my jaw…so now I’m nothin’ like I used to weigh

So I’m just gonna sit in the frock here today…watchin’ the bride bawl away
Ooh, I’m puttin’ on a shockin’ display…splashin’ slime

Looks like I’ve now gotta change…my being still retains the dame
See that queue, if ten people jump me I’m through…what a mess, can’t explain the shame, hell

Weddin’ groom breakin’ my bones…and his girlfriend’s got the cops on the phone
For it’s…two thousand miles they combed…till they found that frock in Rome

Now I’m just gonna sit in the dock here today…watchin’ the bride rail away
Oh dear, I’m sittin’ in the dock here today…facin’ time