Some like a little whippin'; some like to whip
Once these two met each other: down-aisle trip

Zip!
StoopingCowardMasochisticMarriesDominatrix
"Marriage made in Heaven", or perhaps the other way (Styx)   [1]
Talk about a perfect match -- this one's a pure "Grade A" mix
StoopingCowardMasochisticMarriesDominatrix!

Bum, hit, a little lickin', fun for this guy
Domme: spittle drip, butt-kickin'; one more, lets fly

Von Sacher-Masoch, Leopold:
Sex style he prefers   [2]
Betwixt a man and woman, thinks
The power should be hers
His fav'rite novel: read, re-read:
'Bout Venus wearing furs   [3]
How fortunate to find a wife
Who willingly concurs!

Spurs!
SuperCowardMasochisticMarriesDominatrix
"Each to their own", I would say; that's how they get their play-kicks
Sure "beats" watching television: reruns of "The Matrix™"
Start the camera! Video! Can make their own X-rate-flicks!

Wife is a sharp whip-cracker, "Hon of a b*tch"
Sub-hubby: Smack! Crack-snacker, scratch- -ing her itch

To Leopold, attention, turn
An educated guy
Wrote histories of Austria;
Galicia, and nearby;   [4]
Plus fiction: Polish, Russians, Jews,
The German Court: tales, ply   [5]
But found another joy in life
That made his spirits fly!

Why?
Leo met a Baroness: his "Mistress", Fanny Pistor   [6]
Signed a contract: slavery; he never would resist her
Took the train to Italy; her servant, she would blister   [7]
Tried to work that with his wife, but she said, "No way, Mister!   [8]

Way early: feminism: wrote of their views
Though Cath'lic, tolerance espoused for the Jews   [9]


READER: [spoken]

You know, it could work the other way - flip the roles:
missivebesubwomenhandandupperhavethedluolhsneM
It's a great parody idea,
Don't you think?


TURTLE: [spoken]

That's posted today.

[resume singing]

Krafft-Ebing published things to which
Poor Leopold was prone

(Yow! Ouch!)

Such things, to that time's scientists
Were hitherto unknown
Made Leo quite unhappy; with --
-- Krafft-Ebing, picked a bone   [10]


VON SACHER-MASOCH: [spoken]

Hey, you got a minute?


KRAFFT-EBING: [spoken]

Yes ... ?


VON SACHER-MASOCH: [singing]

Concern about effect upon
My mother, I bemoan!   [11]

[spoken:]

Rich, it's my father's name you should use!


TURTLE: [resume singing]

So,
Leo was most certainly "outside the box"-type thinker   [12]
Ev;ry woman that he met, he tried to make a kink-er
Hoping that she'd get his "cheeks" to turn a little pinker
Would she bite on Leo's line, and take it, hook, line, sinker?

Passed away at fifty-nine while under care: head-shrinker   [13]




[1] "Styx" -- to the Greeks, the border between Earth and Underworld, as so eloquently explained in "The Face That Launched A Thousand Ships (Helen Of Troy)", but to Renaissance poet Dante, a part of Hell itself, equally eloquently explained in "The Circles That You'll Find In Hell (Dante's 'Inferno')". (Both co-written by the Odd Couple: an arrogant snot, and the greatest angel on Earth, to put up with him.)


[2]
Leopold von Sacher-Masoch (1836 – 1895) was an Austrian writer of both non-fiction and fiction, but is most noted for the novel in the next footnote, describing his fantasies of sexual subservience, and for actually living them out, inspiring the term "masochism". That term was invented in 1886 by the Austrian psychiatrist Richard Freiherr von Krafft-Ebing (1840–1902) in his book "Psychopathia Sexualis".

(In his teens, TT read Krafft-Ebing's book. Surprisingly, it was *not* on the list of "required reading" for Honors English. Even more surprisingly, it was waay more interesting than the dolts that we *were* required to read, like Herman Melville and Henry James -- zzzzzzzzz. ... And it has provided tons of parody background, e. g., boffing sheep [bestiality], S & M, etc., without actually having to do such things. Reading broadens one's horizons... )

ULTRA-SURPRISING FUN TRIVIA FROM RESEARCH:

Sacher-Masoch is the great-great-uncle to the British singer and actress Marianne Faithfull. ("As Tears Go By", written by Mick Jagger and Keith Richards; made a hit in 1964 by Marianne, then covered by the Stones themselves in 1965. Many other hits.)

ULTRA-FUN SURPRISING TRIVIA FOR EVERYONE EXCEPT THE LEFT:

Sacher-Masoch's political writings and views were Socialist.
(Pain-loving perv and Socialist? Well, correlation does not equal causation, and TT doesn't believe in ad hominem arguments. Just a coincidence, surely...)


[3]
"Venus in Furs", Sacher-Masoch's most famous novel, describes in detail his fantasies, which he eventually put into reality. He especially enjoyed having his mistresses wear furs (and presumably, nothing underneath? Hmmm, trying to picture that -- actually, it *is* kinda -- n/m. ;)

The novel has been referenced in dozens of movies, popular music, and elsewhere. Wikipedia has a listing of some bands and songs linked to the book, its subject, or its title, some of which may be a surprise. Check it out if you like. (Nope, haven't read the novel; don't intend to.)

SUPER I-DON'T-THINK-IT'S-A-COINCIDENCE TRIVIA:

When British police did a drug bust at Keith Ricards' house (Marianne's then-bf), they found her wearing a fur rug and nothing else. (No puns on "rug", please. This whole parody is spicy enough "as-is". ;)


[4] Von Sacher-Masoch was born in the city then known as Lemberg, the capital of the Kingdom of Galicia and Lodomeria, at the time a province of the Austrian Empire (now Lviv, Ukraine)

[5] Stories about the diverse ethnicities in his homeland of Galicia.

[6] Waay too humorous to be made up: His gf''s name was indeed "Fanny Pistor", and you can run with that all day long.... Me, I'm just lettin' it speak for itself.
(Double-play on "Mistress", of course: usual sense of a girlfriend, implying support by the guy, but also the title of address to one's dominatrix, according to research.)

[7] To avoid embarrassment in his home town, he and the Baroness traveled to Italy to live out their "contract". (Aw, c'mon! Don't try to say that *you've* never done anything on vacation that you wouldn't do at home!. ;) LvSM (S/M - what an appropriate monogram!) assumed the name and role of a servant to his Mistress, Leo traveling third class while Ms. Pistor had the champagne and lobster in first class.

[8] The affair with Ms. Pistor was in 1869. Sacher-Masoch married an apparently-"conventional" woman in 1873 -- it's not clear exactly why, given his, uh, "preferences" -- and pressured her into assuming the same role, which she did not care to do. Unsurprisingly, he found the marriage unexciting, eventually divorced her, and married his assistant, who was more accommodating.
(Actually, seems like he should have married the Baroness, doesn't it? No info as to why he didn't.).

[9] Edited a magazine that promoted education and voting rights for women, well ahead of his time (1880s). Though born into a Roman Catholic family, wrote and worked for tolerance and integration of Jews in Saxony (now a state in Germany), ultimately founding an association that fought antisemitism.

[10] Hey, it's common slang for "to have a quarrel with someone". No further comment.


[11]
As is customary in many cultures, hyphenated surnames consisted of the father's family name, followed by the mother's. LvSM was concerned that by attaching the term "masochism" to his preferences, his mother's feelings and reputation would be hurt. He would have preferred that the stain be on the side of the family of his father, a police chief, and hence be called "Sacherism".
(And then, one could ask one's Mistress, "Sach it to me!" Cool! ;)

One biographer suggested that vSM's condition was the result of a dominant mother, a dominant nursemaid, and a dominant aunt. (Seems, then, that the mother did indeed deserve the "title". ;)

Nonetheless, books like "Psychopathia Sexualis" were not considered proper for the general public in that era -- note the use of Latin, as in much of medicine, for the title. So vSM's affliction was not very publicly known until his first wife published her memoirs in 1906, well after his (alleged) death in 1895.


[12] This writer takes no responsibility for any puns read into that line.


[13] In his late fifties, his mental health began to deteriorate ("began"?), and he spent the last years of his life under a psychiatrist's care. He eventually became violent and delusional, and was put in an asylum, while the public was told that he had died, amidst flattering obituaries. (Hence the "alleged" death two footnotes above.) One biographer claims that he lived in the asylum for another ten years, not dying until 1905.

Great lines from the review of the bio, linked in the outro:

"The poor fellow was really a kind of romantic, who always hoped to find the worst in women and hardly ever did"
(He coulda' had some of mine, lol! -- TT.).

"The theme (of his short stories and novels): 'girl beats boy'."
ROFL!!!! Talk about a great plot-title-switch! (i. e., from the clichéd "girl meets boy" genre.)