Eat a Blue Whale by Jeff “Dr Chordate” Moran

In the spring of twenty-one, the West Australian sea.
The blue whale was the biggest beast in all of history.
He had the biggest flukes and a big baleen,
With kidneys big as steers and nerves as big as trees.

Out of the cold and darkest sea, an orca came alone.
He didn’t seem to understand the task that he had chose.
He wanted to eat a blue whale, the giant of the sea,
With kidneys big as steers and nerves as big as trees.

The orca found a blue whale on that fateful day.
The blue whale heard him coming seven miles away.
“I gotta eat a blue whale,” was the orca’s battle cry.
But when the fight was over, ‘twas the orca that had died.

When the news reached the pod, the orcas were enraged.
“We got to find that blue whale, and a battle we will wage.
So, hit the water swimming and turn those fins around.
We got to find that blue whale and we got to eat him down.”

We’ll find that giant blue whale and fight him ‘til he dies.
“We gotta eat the blue whale!” was the battle cry.
Hit the water swimming and turn those fins around.
We gotta find that blue whale and we gotta eat him down.

For three long days and weary nights, the orca pod did hunt.
The matriarchal leader said, “That whale we must confront.
Somewhere in this ocean, I know he’s gotta be.
We gotta find that blue whale in this southern sea.”

The fourth day the orca pod saw their giant prey.
And they were elated. This seemed like feeding day.
The matriarchal leader said, “Turn those fins around.
We’ve found the giant blue whale and we gotta eat him down.”

The orcas formed a charging front and moved in swimming fast.
The first one bit some blubber, they knew he couldn’t last.
Now that mighty blue whale is just a memory.
“Eat the blue whale” was the battle cry that shook the seven seas.

We’ll find that giant blue whale and try to eat him down.
We gotta eat the blue whale, blubber, muscle, bone.
Hit the water swimming and turn those fins around.
We gotta find that blue whale and we gotta eat him down.