You are my sometime, my only sometime
You make me happy when wife's away
She'll never know, dear, and you won't tell her
If you do, you'll lose what I pay

The other night, dear, my wife was with me
I dreamed I held you oh so sweet
When I awoke, dear, reached for my wallet
But, I'd just wetted on the sheet

You are my sometime, my only sometime
You make me happy when wife's away
She'll never know, dear, and you won't tell her
If you do, you'll lose what I pay

You haul a big purse, inside's your crack pipe
You ask for lighters all the times
You're always puffin and often coughin'
From that glass tube and your "Dimes"

You are my sometime, my only sometime
You keep me happy when Pearl's away
Pearl is my wife's name, we do a sex game
Now and then, twice a week, condom play..

You told me once, dear, you even loved me
I should divorce her, and marry you
But, if I did dear, it wouldn't work out
'Cause I'd just cheat on you, too
(And crack pipes, I don't do)

You are my sometime, my only sometime
You make me happy when wife's away
She'll never find out, unless you tell her
If you do, you'll lose what I pay