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Song Parodies -> "My Epidermis"
Original Song Title:
"My Way"
Original Performer:
Frank Sinatra
Parody Song Title:
"My Epidermis"
Parody Written by:
Patrick McWilliams
The Lyrics
Those rare times when I venture out of my cave to mingle with the public, I am beginning to see a lot of people with tattoos in weird places, such as their necks and cleavage and worse. It hurts and it costs money, so that leaves me out. I still associate tattoos with concentration camp victims. And every time I watch "America's Most Wanted" or similar shows, the fugitive is always identifiable by a prominent tattoo that practically reads "Arrest Me". The other day a lady I know showed me a very nicely done tattoo of a skull. But, she said that some "artists" are not always careful with lettering and she knew of someone whose declaration of life read "No Regerts". That was enough for me to build a parody on. Hope you agree.
I've got some extra dough
And now I've got the urge to spend it
My flesh is far too plain
So I've decided to amend it
Transforming it by pain
Crazed masochists, some people term us
It's there, for all to see
My epidermis
REGERTS, I have a few
This new tattoo, the guy's no speller
The equipment wasn't clean
And now my skin is turning yeller
It's just the risk we take
To let some needle jockey perm us
Mistakes, I bear for life
My epidermis
Those Chinese words, or so I thought
Meant "Peace" and "Love", but they did not
At Beijing Feast, rolled up my sleeve
The management told us to leave
It's just my luck, I wave "You suck"!
My epidermis
A private work of art
Only my best of friends will know it
In a secluded spot
Have to moon you just to show it
The calls keep coming in
They are all asking me whose turn is
This week, to sneak a peek
My epidermis
Some say it's a sin to mark your skin
Creator's gift, when you begin
To change the way that you appear
But ridicule I do not fear
This hide still shows, a skull and rose
My epidermis
And now I've got the urge to spend it
My flesh is far too plain
So I've decided to amend it
Transforming it by pain
Crazed masochists, some people term us
It's there, for all to see
My epidermis
REGERTS, I have a few
This new tattoo, the guy's no speller
The equipment wasn't clean
And now my skin is turning yeller
It's just the risk we take
To let some needle jockey perm us
Mistakes, I bear for life
My epidermis
Those Chinese words, or so I thought
Meant "Peace" and "Love", but they did not
At Beijing Feast, rolled up my sleeve
The management told us to leave
It's just my luck, I wave "You suck"!
My epidermis
A private work of art
Only my best of friends will know it
In a secluded spot
Have to moon you just to show it
The calls keep coming in
They are all asking me whose turn is
This week, to sneak a peek
My epidermis
Some say it's a sin to mark your skin
Creator's gift, when you begin
To change the way that you appear
But ridicule I do not fear
This hide still shows, a skull and rose
My epidermis
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| 5 | 9 | 9 | 9 |
User Comments
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what about a gun tattoo? he, he, he...
I'd rather have the gun. Cheaper. And if I get tired of it, I can sell. Don't ever want to meet someone who collects tattoos (other peoples').
give that poor tattoo artist who wrote "No Regerts" a break, they were eating a Milky Way! 5s
555 pin pricks with ink! Me too, Patrick, I'd take the gun. There are literally too many firearms in the world I like to cover this body! And favorites can change over time. I bet if you did get a gun tattoo Patrick that it would be of an Enfield rifle OR some pistols in .32 cal ;-)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n4zRe_wvJw8
Leviticus 19:28 says "Do not cut your bodies for the dead, and do not mark your skin with tattoos. I am the LORD."
Jonathan beat me to the Milky Way comment. As an occasional naturist, I wouldn't consider tattoos. Funny parody
I knew there was a Biblical injunction against tattooing. Thanks for the exact quote. It always impressed me as something primitive and pagan. The same, or even more so with piercings. That may be one of the reasons the Nazis tattooed the Jewish victims of the concentration camps. I can't help but think that people who tattoo their faces and necks are severely limiting their employment opportunities. The officer in charge of the police dispatch center in Kansas City, Kansas told me employees are not permitted to have tattoos. And that's in a job that is not seen by the public. I fear that having a .32 caliber pistol inked on my skin would be almost as painful as being shot with one. There is a new version of "Sounds of Silence" on youtube. Look at this dude: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u9Dg-g7t2l4 "Disturbed" is the right word to describe him.
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