[Verse 1]
You're so nasty, Mr. Grouch,
You're up to sneaky tricks,
You think you're so very clever, you think you're so smart and slick, Mr. Grouch.
You're giving us garbage that will make people sick!

[Verse 2]
You're so naughty, Mr. Grouch.
Your stuff's an awful smell.
Your yacht is really slimy, you've got termites in your spell, Mr. Grouch.
I wouldn't want to throw you in the water that's from your well!

[Verse 3]
You're so evil, Mr. Grouch,
You have garlic on your shag,
You are filled with green and greedy for a greasy paper bag, Mr. Grouch.
If you had me choose one more thing to take, I'd take your greasy paper bag!

[Verse 4]
You are so ugly, Mr. Grouch,
You're a muddy, cruddy punk,
Your sofa is too funky, it's as smelly as a skunk, Mr. Grouch.
The three words that best describe you are as follows, and I quote,
"Big, bad, chunk!"

[Verse 5]
You're so rotten, Mr. Grouch,
You're the prince of puny pests,
Your soul's a gross baloney sandwich piled up with Crest, Mr. Grouch.
Your heart is a disgusting varmint that is sending us some wasted litter,
Along with some undesired tasteless waste material, covered up with all of your mess!

[Verse 6]
You're such a meanie, Mr. Grouch,
With your mean and nasty cash,
You're a crazy little monster, and you're tossing us your trash, Mr. Grouch.
You're a lame grouchy green Muppet who stole our Christmas and left in a flash!