Hello momma, hello daddy
here's a letter from your laddie
we're located somewhere highland
In a boot camp going by name of Parris Island

Bunks are plenty in our dormy
We have homely uniform-y
I think I like it here in Army
Get three meals a day and it's easier than farming

I got haircut when arrived here
Would you send me money, Mom, dear?
I got gaming with guy called Joker
I lost everything at attic playing poker

Sergeant Hartmann is our boss-y
I'm afraid when he gets cross-y
He is, I think, kinda bully
when he ordered us to crawl in gully

You remember Leonard Lawerence?
I refer him with some abhorrence
He is fatso and not smarty
Soon we'll give him nightly blanket party

In the forest are bacilli
but a friend has certain pill-y
which he bought from an ugly chummy
and it makes you feeling really cool and funny

I'm not afraid of war or slaughter
my bunkmate has firewater
which he has made of potaties
and he sells it at the barracks almost gratis

We have rifles, guns and mortars
Like a cannon, but bit shorter
And it shoots a kind of flyer
which goes "boom" and gets to lit a forest fire

I have learned to handle rifle
throw grenade and stab and stiffle
And to crawl it on all fours
as I got a snakebite one day at the outdoors

We don't need no Frogs or Tommies
as we'll get to killing Commies
We will soon go to Viet Nam
I don't know where it is, perhaps a foreign land

So dear daddy and dear mommy,
I'll have soon chance to kill a Commy
It gets exciting and much better
I will tell you more next time you'll have a letter