I was driving down the beltway one night
When my eyes beheld an ominous sight
For the Mustangs from the front began to spin clockwise
And suddenly, before my eyes

They did the crash
They did the monster crash
The monster crash
It was a toll road smash
They did the crash
The taillights flickered and flashed
They did the crash
They did the monster crash

For my driving lane was a sight to my east
From the Toyota sedans hit a bumper piece
The Fords all swerved not a moment ago
To avoid hitting the side of my Camaro

They did the crash
They did the monster crash
The monster crash
It was a toll road smash
They did the crash
The taillights flickered and flashed
They did the crash
They did the monster crash

The Volvos were having fun
The pileup had just begun
The next wrecks were a green van
And a GMC Canyon
The scene was shocking, all were recording it now
Mercedes on Benz, slammed by a Nissan Pao
The Honda Civics were about to arrive
With their ricer group, but they just might not survive

They did the crash
They did the monster crash
The monster crash
It was a toll road smash
They did the crash
The taillights flickered and flashed
They did the crash
They did the monster crash

Out from the fires a fire truck did ring
Seems it was skidding on just one thing
Opened its ladder and shook its hose
And said "Out on the beltway, anything goes"

They did the crash
They did the monster crash
The monster crash
It was a toll road smash
They did the crash
The taillights flickered and flashed
They did the crash
They did the monster crash

Now everything's okay
The beltway's safe again
And the Monster Crash was the news of the land
For you, the driver, this crash could happen to you
When it occurs once more, do what I could do.

And you can crash
And you can monster crash
The monster crash
And do my toll road smash
And you can crash
Your taillights will flicker and flash
And you can crash
And you can monster crash