Stedman has to burrow in to mark the place--
Jolly roger springs to take a stand.
Stedman says, "By golly. . .likes to feed her face,
A hot dog and and huge hunk of ham held in each hand."

Oprah eat, Oprah large; bites go on: barge;
Oh my, how those bites go on.
Oprah eat, Oprah large; bites go on: barge;
Oh my, sprightly light she's non-.

Stedman's feeling sorry 'cause his jewels are stored
Tightly in his meant-to-carry sling.
Takes it out for boring at the baby door,
But he can't slip it to her till she shrinks her thing.

Oprah eat, Oprah large; bites go on: barge;
Oh my, how those bites go on.
Oprah be oh so large; bites go on: starch;
Oh my, sprightly light she's non-.

She's a couple of rears; fills, eats out of house and home.
Got a couple of chins; drunk ale by the yard--
Her peso tops 20 stone.

Happy he is not: he cannot dart the place;
Stedman's given up and takes his hand. . .
Jolly-making. . .bone done at a frisky pace,
Because the eatin' beast's passed 80 kilograms.

Oprah eat, Oprah large; bites go on: barge;
Oh my, how those bites go on.
Oprah be oh so large; bites go on: starch.
Oh my, sprightly light she's non-.
Oprah eat, Oprah large; bites go on: barge;
Oh my, how those bites go on.
Oprah be oh so large; bites go on: barge;
Oh my, sprightly light she's non-.

She's been labeled as "queer"; has she made a hom'-she home?
Is the labial dip done by cunning pard,
So Stedman's a ball-less drone?
(Lard pard [re]tards sparred hard)

Happy gal is snacking at a scarf-it pace.
Paw begets no children. . . .Stedy hand.
Read the rag at home. . .back to the marketplace
To git more readin' for when sittin' on the can.

Oeuvre's ledes be so arch. I go on, parched
For "Enquirer"; I can't stop.
Oprah eat, Oprah large; bites go on: barge.
"Enquirer"'s over the top.

She's gonna top a ton
Weight's over the "fat" mark.