He had nailed seven Tours, but the rumours came his way
TV and radio guys said fair he just didn’t play

They got on Lance (Lance, Lance, Lance!) They said that he had shot
substances wrought
Lance, Lance, Lance, right up he had shot
Get away, he thought
Lance, Lance, Lance, he’d get away he thought
Lance. . .no!

Then they got shot down, his seven crowns ’cause he’d stick
in a thick needle size, and that’s what made him so quick
He’d shot up, Lance. Lanced, lanced, lanced, removed blood? That’s a “not”
That is a “not”
Lance, Lance, Lance ran a blood-doping plot
Get away, he thought
Lance, Lance, Lance, he’d get away he thought
Lance. . .no!

Bad boy!

Nike looks askance; the contracts blow up fast
He couldn’t fool ’em no mo’; his doping enterprise: vast
He lost ’em, Lance (Lance, Lance, Lance!) all the titles he’d got
He has them not
Banned, banned, banned from racing’s what was wrought
He’s beat. . .revealed plot
Lance, Lance, Lance, he’d get away he thought
Lance banned. Banned, Lance. Lance banned. Bye!

Lanced banned. Banned, Lance. . . .