I just got hit by a fla-ash flood
Knee-deep in cold water a-and mud
Not the worse damage it's do-o-one (uh, uh)
Here are my problems with fla-ash floods, hey (uh, hey)

First the obvious: I'm wet as crap (uh)
My shoes are really damn soggy and they smell bad (so friggin' bad)
Wade through the streets and I can see a green Fiat (a green one)
Afloat, pity who owns it, see the plate, that's mine, crap
That's just lame, dude and the same's true
For the endless rain, dude
No umbrella on moi, why? Wait and I'll explain, dude
Main weatherman's lame, true
Said the day'd be warm but then a sudden storm
Whipped up and dripped so much that there's fish galore
Ah, ah

Oh, I'm not mad, dude
My emotions are mild
It's no lie

Still dealin' with this damn fla-ash flood
Plans for today are a ta-ad stuffed
And let me tell you it su-u-ucks
I'm not a big fan of fla-ash floods, hey
So many pro-oblems
A lot of posters have fa-allen
They had the dates for stand-u-u-up (uh, uh)
Shows I had int'rest in, da-amn flood, hey (hey)

A lot of things 'bout this that piss me off (uh-huh)
The traffic's slower when the street's awash
Can't they go faster? You'd think they would be quicker
Since all their ti-ires are slicker thanks to the sudden river
Maybe I don't know how ti-ires work, but it's hard
Thinkin' this through
When I'm so mad cause I'm late for work, it's true
Don't want to deal with my manager's glower
And yes, he's aware of the flash flood now

Oh, he's a mad douche
Won't give me slack, de-espite
The new ti-i-i-ide

So much that sucks 'bout this fla-ash flood
See all the clouds up there? Tha-at sucks
It just looks gloomy and glu-u-um
Thanks to the weather of fla-ash floods, hey
Now all the bo-ottoms
Of the bins round here have go-ot lots
Of floatin' rubbish and ju-u-unk
That just looks tacky, damn fla-ash flood, hey

You should see inside my home
My carpet's a mess, it blows
My TV went zap, can't watch my shows
And I've shit insurance, gotta shill out all the dough
Now at work and it's a load (hey, uh)
So much cleanin' up, it blows (hey, uh)
It's how I get cash, afraid it's so (hey, uh)
Mmm-mmm
Gettin' close to mad, not there though-ough-ough

I can deal with the dumb fla-ash flood (uh)
A little wetness ain't ba-ad, bud
Sure, there's a lot that still su-u-ucks (hey)
It's not the worst kind of fla-ash flood, hey (flash floo-ood)
No building's fa-allen
Because of all the ero-osion (uh) (don't like ero-osio-o-on)
That's a gradual thing, bu-u-ud
That won't happen with one fla-ash flood, hey (takes more than one)
Glad it's only a fla-ash flood (uh)
Volcanoes would leave that a-ash muck (uh)
And those tornadoes sure su-u-uck (that's a bad pun, hey)
So I don't mind the whole fla-ash flood, hey (ooh-oh-oh)
All of its pro-oblems (uh)
Can be quite easily so-olved, bud (uh)
Not like an earthquake, they su-u-uck
So I won't rage at the fla-ash flood, hey