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Song Parodies -> "Coming On To Me"

Original Song Title:

"Down On Me"

Original Performer:

Jeremih ft. 50 Cent

Parody Song Title:

"Coming On To Me"

Parody Written by:

Rebekah Dub

The Lyrics

[Rebekah Dub]
He wants me, I can tell he wants me
Wants me to come up to him
Despite the fact I just arrived
Haven’t even found a spot, and the place is really packed
R-Dub and her girls determined not to become his targets
(He’s a-starin’)
See him, see him (We see him comin’)
Coming, coming, coming, coming
(Coming, he’s coming on to)
See him, see him
(Coming onto)
Dodge him, dodge him
Just get, get away

OK, I’m headed to the dance floor, but my girls proceed to body-block
I try to tell them I like this song, but they aren’t having it
But even though we walk away, this bearded dude watches us
His teeth are rotted, and he’s dancing so provocatively (whilst staring)
There’s a hot bartender
Get a round of Cosmos, they’re only ‘bout twenty
And we can drink ‘em drink ‘em drink ‘em
‘Til the bastard stops what he’s doing
Stops his obnoxious behavior
(Ugh, ugh, ugh, ugh)
This bartender’s hot
Does he have a girlfriend?
Look at his biceps
He’s got pretty eyes and a nice chiseled jawline
I could bet that he’s just as hot in broad daylight

I swear the creep’s eyes are laser-focused on me
I saw him staring from my periphery
He hasn’t yet approached, yet he’s on to me
With the signals he sends, I swear he’s coming
He’s coming on to me
Coming on to me
On, on to me
Coming on to me
He’s throwing me off-guard
With his laser-sharp stare
I gather ‘round my girls because I think he’s
Coming on to me

[Creepy Guy]
I can’t find the pretty girl
Who just came in with her friends
Last time I saw her she tried to
Approach but her girls dragged her off
She’s shaped just like an hourglass
Oh, how I’d like to tap that ass
Girl army’s protecting her
They don’t know I’d never hurt her
Please give me a ch-ch-chance
Really like her p-p-pants
Hold her tight while on the floor
In case she dance like marching ants
She’s looking really sexual
I hope she’s not asexual
I’d love to punch that bartender
Knock out a tooth or break a bone
They must think I’m a drunk
Or a Class-A douche
They don’t really know me, know me
I’d send them to Heaven, Heaven
I’d be a good fit, I’m told I’m the shit
But can she handle
She handle all-a this?

[Rebekah Dub]
I swear the creep’s eyes are laser-focused on me
I saw him staring from my periphery
He hasn’t yet approached, yet he’s on to me
With the signals he sends, I swear he’s coming
He’s coming on to me
Coming on to me
On, on to me
Coming on to me
He’s throwing me off-guard
With his laser-sharp stare
I gather ‘round my girls because I think he’s
Coming on to me

[Rebekah Dub’s Friend]
Get the hell outta Dodge
I see him approaching
Sweet-talk the bartender
Into letting us hide behind
That nice maple-wood bar
Behind which he’s working
We need protection
From that creepy douchebag

[Hot Bartender]
Just call Security
Bouncer’s standing right there
He can rid this place of
Nasty, stinky douchebags like the
One who keeps harassing
You and all your girlfriends
Next time I’ll offer
Your Cosmos on the house

Dub, I would like your number
Just ignore that douche standing behind you

[Rebekah Dub]
Need a napkin… and pen

Ugh, the creep’s eyes are still laser-focused on me
I saw him staring from my periphery
He finally approached and he’s on to me
With all his signals sent, I swear he’s coming
He’s coming on to me
Coming on to me
On, on to me
Coming on to me
I hope that bartender
Plans to give me a call,
To save me from that creep who came on to me
Who came on to me
Don't you just hate it when you're minding your business and creeps come on to you? I do, too.

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
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 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
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 4   0
 0
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 5   4
 4
 4
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Rob Arndt - January 12, 2012 - Report this comment
555... for creepiness factor!!! Sorry for the late voting- ER time again today :(
Rebekah Dub - January 12, 2012 - Report this comment
Thank you. Glad you enjoyed it. I immediately picture Larry the Cable Guy in the role of the creep. =)

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