Water sets off all my ne-erves
I hear it runnin', that's when I sta-art movin'
Something's in there that can hu-urt
A thing that wants some human flesh fo-or munchin'
You can tell me that it's just a tap but I don't care
All my brain will tell me is "those fish monsters are here"
No, they're no hallucination or some other dreck
They're as real as you and me, so you'd best take that back

When the water flo-ows, it nea-early-y stops my-y heart
Cause somewhere in the dee-eep i-is a-a horde o-of sharks
They'll bite my a-arse so
Dude
Dude, they'll bite my a-arse so
Dude
Dude, they'll bite my a-arse so

Ocean, river or a po-ond
All those toothy freaks are getti-in' closer
Glass of water? Piss right o-off
If I drink that, a shark will bite my-y shoulder
Have to wear a blindfold in the shower cause my hair
Will be full of tiny little demon sharks, I fear
It's the reason why I'm lazy, so worried my sweat
Will spawn more point-ridden monsters cause it's so a fa-a-act

My eyes make it so-o, such a-a strai-ain on my-y heart
If I think that I'll see-ee a-a who-ole lot o-of sharks
They'll bite my a-arse so
Dude
Dude, they'll bite my a-arse so
Dude
Dude, they'll bite my a-arse so

Laugh it all off, you still think it's no-ot true-ue
Fine then, explain these bi-ites
I've not been to the beach in mo-onths, du-ude
Still got bites down my thi-ighs

I'm afraid it's so-o, it's no-ot pu-ulled out my-y arse
Any liquid I see-ee wi-ill spa-awn tons o-of sharks
They'll bite my a-arse so
Dude
Dude, they'll bite my a-arse so
Dude
Dude, they'll bite my a-arse so