You called, I came to thee
Call to adventure ended bad, it seems
Does it hurt? A look's a must
'Cause the type of infection will change the whole cure up
So was it a big lycanthrope
That took quite a nasty snap right out of you?
There's gonna be one good way to know
And that's when I check it, must inspect it, bite's not right

A werewolf makes more damage to make a bicep sandwich
So I don't think that is it, I'll keep thinkin', bite's not right
Maybe a blood-suck bandit, the flesh is pale, key damage
But it can't be vampiric, more than two pricks, bite's not right

Bite's not right
Bite's not right
Bite's not right

No hint of death to see
Do you feel any hunger for me? Might be zombies
Has the hurt spread through to your heart?
Do you find yourself longin' for my brains freshly carved?
All of my questions, you've said "No"
Between all the grunts and nasty words you've spewed
Say sorry, please, I'm just tryna know
How you've been infected, gotta test it, bite's not right

Is there a need to panic? Or is it minor damage?
Sit still and let me scan it, stop your jerkin', bite's not right
If you won't be examined, then spill the beans, goddamnit
A standard big cat gnawin'? That's just borin', bite's not right

Bite's not right
Bite's not right
Bite's not right
Bite's not right

Check the damage, what beast snapped it?
Double-check it, bite's not right
That "big cat" shit ain't dramatic
Must be diff'rent, bite's not right
"Understand it"? Not yet at it
Needs more workin', bite's not right
Shut up, cram it, I can't stand it
Course it hurts, twit, bite's not right

Somethin's made puncture damage, enough to make you panic
And seek the nearest medic, so stop jerkin', bite's not right
You've told your tale, I've panned it, I doubt some big ol' cat bit
Your arm, it's way too bland, this needs more pokin', bite's not right