Ev'ryone that I've seen in today's rounds
Just yelled "Hell no!", so
It's the same old usual thing now
They always go "No!"
Can't recall the last time that they've been fair
And heard my whole spiel
Before they teach me whole new compound swears
Not a fair trade, I feel

I've been door-to-door (to-door-to-door)
And it seems ev'ryone loves to be ignored
I've been door-to-door (to-door-to-door)
And they've all been shut on me by the score
Mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm, ho-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
Mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm, ev'ry single door
Mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm, ho-oh, yeah, yeah-eah
Mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm, closed-up doors

Kinda mean to slam the door right now
Right on my nose, so
Why must I continue? Been a month
Still say "No!", so
Wouldn't you be tired of this pace?
Have a go, you might be
Less inclined to repeat on this place
Don't say "No!" kindly

I've been door-to-door (to-door-to-door)
And they all ended up shut, not worth the chore
I've been door-to-door (to-door-to-door)
It's a pattern than one should not ignore
Mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm, oh-oh-ho-ooh-oh-oh-oh
Mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm, ev'ry single door
Mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm, oh-oh-ho-oh-oh-oh
Mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm, closed-up doors

We sell crap, don't we? Total crap, don't we?
That's why doors are closin' (ooh-oh-oh)
We sell crap, don't we? Utter crap, don't we?
Product's bogus (we sell crap, don't we?)
We sell crap, don't we? It's all crap, don't we?
No-one wants ear hosin' (yeah-eah)
We sell crap, don't we? Total crap, don't we?
Hoo-ooh-ooh

I've been door-to-door (to-door-to-door) (ev'ry door) (all of them are closin')
Please can we go where we haven't been before (oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh)?
I've been door-to-door (to-door-to-door) (all of them are closin') (ho-oh, ho-oh) (ev'ry door)
Doubt that we'll be attacked at the big store
I've been door-to-door (to-door-to-door) (I've been door-to-door) (all of them are closin')
No, no-one here's outright punched me, let's explore (ooh-ooh-ooh-oh-oh-oh) (doors keep closin')
I've been door-to-door (to-door-to-door) (yeah-eah, yeah-eah) (all of them are closin')
More options before one does, I implore