All around the world, petty jerks
Think they're all men, but you're boys
Cut the shit, I'm annoyed (your petty shit)
They're just so petty
All around the world, petty jerks
Love to whine a whole bunch
When there's a "slight" that isn't one (up their ass, sticks)
They're just so petty

Hey, do you know what will always be lame?
Thinkin' small grievances are from hate
You can betcha wherever the je-erks go-o, fo-olks swa-allow
Their curses, won't validate them, no
Such an ass, cause when the line is slow
They'll go off, they're so predictable, "A-Are you a-all snails?"
And then when their turn comes around
They're slower, time's crawlin 'now
"What we get" (whoo)? They think they're funny
In fact, they're just scummy

All around the world, petty jerks
Think they're bold, but they're just boys
Little shits makin' noise
They're just so petty
All around the world, petty jerks
Think a slight's an affront
To their whole life, but they're just nuts
They're just so petty

You see them pull the same tactic in their cars
Cause empathy's just way too damn hard
And let's not even get into ho-ow whe-en they say "Baby"
And you turn them down real polite
They act like they got shanked by knives
Screamin' gendered slurs online, no-ot to you-our face
And even when they get called out
Won't repent, because right now
They think they're the real wronged party
The real victim? Hardly

All around the world, petty jerks (uh-huh)
They're not strong, they're little boys
Scream like they broke their toys
They're just so petty
All around the world, petty jerks
Roll my eyes, they're so dumb
Takin' revenge for a small bump (oh yeah)
They're just so petty-y-y-y-y-y

Damn, they're gettin' so angry
Cause I said they were rude bit more than blandly
Their eyes go twitchy-twitchy, gone and made them mad
So friggin' picky with what words'll make 'em go do that (oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh)
The wrong expression and they'll turn into such a beast
Try to get you kicked out of KFC
Huge jerks, though (ooh) I often do not mind
Because those boys gettin' pissy never try to fight this (ow)

Dumbass dipshits, uh-huh

All around the world, petty jerks
Want to roar, but they're just boys
Throw a fit, I'm annoyed
They're just so petty (he-e-ey)
All around the world, petty jerks (petty jerks)
Think they're right, but they're wrong
And still they find just what they want
They're just so petty