On line, for the T-O-T
There stood my fam‘ly and me
With my wife, pops, boys and girls
So fun at Walt Disney World.

My two brothers tagged us here too
This place has lots of awesome things to do
The line ended, we sat down
The ride gave out those eerie sounds.

Right through the 5th Dimension
Began my tale I should mention
Just as I thought the ride had stopped
It launched right up, and into the first drop
And I -

Whizzed in my shorts!

Walt Disney World’s thrill caught me by such swift surprise
My kids can’t believe their own darn eyes
Small wonder it’s named Tower of Terror
And I just –

Whizzed in my shorts!

The ride is over, and we are getting off
Whizzed some more when I laughed my wet butt off
Got a spare pair, I need a men’s restroom stop
Excuse me, I must change…

Eating packed butties, lemonade
Waited that 3 PM parade
Tops to the wife who had kept me so sane
Though those ham butties, my kids complained

Right around the corner in Frontierland
Was a 350-piece marching band
It seemed my troubles escaped, all gone
As 8 15-something girls tossed their batons
And the thing that made the band so cool
Was that it came down from my OWN high school
And I –

Whizzed in my shorts!

It’s perfectly normal, nothing wrong with me
But I felt I had just embarrassed Mickey
For being excited in happy sorts
So I –

Whizzed in my shorts!

And I say, as an alumnus
The color guard and dance team all had enticed us
“Superb job kids,” I said as an ex-classmate
I wet my shorts ‘cuz they sounded great!

Next day, on F-O-P
Kids elated to ride on the banshees
That part when Neytiri crowed
In a proud voice, “Sivako!”
I had –

Whizzed in my shorts!

Back at the Magic Kingdom when night fell
In the purple sky flew Tinker Bell
The fireworks burst colors, magically
And I –

Whizzed in my shorts!

Later, back in the hotel,
I –

Whizzed in my shorts!

When I checked our bags at MCO
I –

Whizzed in my shorts!

When our airplane took off out of Orlando, I –

Whizzed in my shorts!

I just saw the bills
And I –

Whizzed in my shorts

Disney made me –

Whiz in my shorts!

Mickey (speaks):
Some imagination, huh? Ha ha!

I whizzed right in my shorts
On vacation at Disney
Having a jov’al time
With my own darn family
You call it immature,
But it’s the lifestyle for me!
Next time, I’ll take those restroom breaks
At least hourly –

Prone to:

Whiz in my shorts!

(Whiz whiz, in my shorts
Whiz whiz, in my shorts
Prone to whiz in my shorts
Prone to whiz in my shorts…)

I’d whiz in my shorts!

(Prone to whiz in my shorts
Prone to whiz in my shorts…)