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Song Parodies -> "Thieves and Cons and Beggars"
Original Song Title:
"We Belong Together"
(MP3)Original Performer:
Mariah Carey
Parody Song Title:
"Thieves and Cons and Beggars"
Parody Written by:
Nib Oswald
The Lyrics
Historically, Australia was first colonised by the scum of England, like one big Alcatraz prison. Aint much changed, really...
Rooogues, ohhh.
Hooobooos.
Street thrugs
Filth!
We need to sweep up all these larrikins and picaros.
Can't walk alone at night, as beggars try and get our gold.
Those criminal ruffians, always lootin',
Always boorish, tryin' to swipe all our wealth!
Our women and children are not safe from evil louts and thugs.
Move in the shadows. Vile villians! They rely on stealth.
All those felonous youths, with their criminal sprees,
In their hoards of depravity. Rife with such filth!
The thieving brats are stealing now and they don't show remorse.
The savage lot of miscreants think they're above our laws.
Oh, what we need to get is someone piping, dressed-up pied.
Wipe out those vagrants!
Sin and theft and hustling marr our streets.
Is it so hard to police?
Can't those vagrants leave, those
Thieves and cons and beggars!
Where else are there gutters teemin',
As crimes erupt?
We can't go walking freely around,
If it's after dusk.
Who's gonna free this place,
Of all those bloody haggards?
Those shady vagrants,
Thieves and cons and beggars!
Oh, they creep at night.
All those horrid, sly swine.
Hunting poor innocent ladies, oh.
Rings and rubies
Thieving things, those whoreson louts!
"Not my pendant, that was not cheap!" (Stop thief!)
Such rotten perpetrations!
Need to get these slimeballs,
All clapped in chains.
Take them far off overseas!
Once we have shipped those youths,
Australia will start.
A land of thieves, cons and beggars.
What a lovely thought!
Australia calls out as our remedy.
We'll haul them crims,
Way down under and stick 'em all there. A panacea: gone!
No crazed delinquents or foul bums.
So we see them off to near New Zealand with cheer.
We're free of thieves attacking Brits here!
Gang-free!
Sin and theft and hustling marr our streets.
Is it so hard to police?
Can't those vagrants leave, those
Thieves and cons and beggars!
Where else are there gutters teemin',
As crimes erupt?
We can't go walking freely around,
If it's after dusk.
Who's gonna free this place,
Of all those bloody haggards?
Those shady vagrants,
Thieves and cons and beggars!
Awaaay, thief!!!
Sin and theft and hustling marred our streets!
So we drove it overseas!
Now this place is free from
Thieves and cons and beggars!
Where else are there gutters clean now,
As crimes have stopped?
We can go walking free through the town,
Til the sun comes up!
Now England's free of vagrants,
And hobos and haggards!
Australia takes 'em!
Shielas, yobs and swagmen!!!
Hooobooos.
Street thrugs
Filth!
We need to sweep up all these larrikins and picaros.
Can't walk alone at night, as beggars try and get our gold.
Those criminal ruffians, always lootin',
Always boorish, tryin' to swipe all our wealth!
Our women and children are not safe from evil louts and thugs.
Move in the shadows. Vile villians! They rely on stealth.
All those felonous youths, with their criminal sprees,
In their hoards of depravity. Rife with such filth!
The thieving brats are stealing now and they don't show remorse.
The savage lot of miscreants think they're above our laws.
Oh, what we need to get is someone piping, dressed-up pied.
Wipe out those vagrants!
Sin and theft and hustling marr our streets.
Is it so hard to police?
Can't those vagrants leave, those
Thieves and cons and beggars!
Where else are there gutters teemin',
As crimes erupt?
We can't go walking freely around,
If it's after dusk.
Who's gonna free this place,
Of all those bloody haggards?
Those shady vagrants,
Thieves and cons and beggars!
Oh, they creep at night.
All those horrid, sly swine.
Hunting poor innocent ladies, oh.
Rings and rubies
Thieving things, those whoreson louts!
"Not my pendant, that was not cheap!" (Stop thief!)
Such rotten perpetrations!
Need to get these slimeballs,
All clapped in chains.
Take them far off overseas!
Once we have shipped those youths,
Australia will start.
A land of thieves, cons and beggars.
What a lovely thought!
Australia calls out as our remedy.
We'll haul them crims,
Way down under and stick 'em all there. A panacea: gone!
No crazed delinquents or foul bums.
So we see them off to near New Zealand with cheer.
We're free of thieves attacking Brits here!
Gang-free!
Sin and theft and hustling marr our streets.
Is it so hard to police?
Can't those vagrants leave, those
Thieves and cons and beggars!
Where else are there gutters teemin',
As crimes erupt?
We can't go walking freely around,
If it's after dusk.
Who's gonna free this place,
Of all those bloody haggards?
Those shady vagrants,
Thieves and cons and beggars!
Awaaay, thief!!!
Sin and theft and hustling marred our streets!
So we drove it overseas!
Now this place is free from
Thieves and cons and beggars!
Where else are there gutters clean now,
As crimes have stopped?
We can go walking free through the town,
Til the sun comes up!
Now England's free of vagrants,
And hobos and haggards!
Australia takes 'em!
Shielas, yobs and swagmen!!!
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User Comments
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This was so silly. It's too bad I don't know the OS...smeh, the title gets fives anyway.
DKTOS? It's the new 'Hollaback Girl' down here, played every hour of the day. And every day of the week. And every week of the hour.
Great Parody. I think Mariah is overrated. And her songs are annoying, too.
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