Hello, I’m Hu’s On First. For a long time we’ve listened to the Donald pitch a fit about his hard times and “American carnage”. Well, ain’t that the pits? So I think I’ll take me an imaginary trip, and try to be the Donald for a day.

CHORUS:
If I could be the Donald for a day
I could live my life the free and easy way
I’d build my towers high and let the people pay
If I could be the Donald for a day

Now if for just one day, the Donald I could be
The first thing I’d do is join the Breitbart family
And I’d let Stephen K. Bannon do all my thinking for me
If I could be the Donald for a day

Now I wouldn’t want to work, so I wouldn’t have to
Know what I’d do next? You shouldn’t need a clue
I’d go down to my own golf course, like all the presidents do
If I could be the Donald for a day

CHORUS

Now when I sit down in that office, the one that’s oval in shape
I’d try to tie Mueller’s hands up with red tape
And I’d put some poor migrant kid in a cage like an ape
If I could be the Donald for a day

Now I’d have plenty of time, so on Twitter I would go
I’d call Hillary a bitch, and Omarosa a ho
And when I pick fights with Ilhan I really would go low
If I could be the Donald for a day

CHORUS

And I’d say Russia’s a witch hunt and there was no collusion
And make the EPA not be so hard on pollution
And cut taxes for the super-rich, cause that’s my solution
If I could be the Donald for a day

But I can’t be the Donald, and I don’t really have to be
Cause Trump, let me tell you, it’s plain and simple to see
That if I was you for a day then I’d be stealing from me
So I don’t wanna be the Donald for a day

I don’t wanna be the Donald for a day
I don’t wanna live the free and easy way
I’ll struggle long, and struggle hard, but that’s okay
‘Cause I’ll never be the Donald for a day
No I’ll never be the Donald for a day