Blame it on the food
It makes you go poop
Blame it on the stove
Cooked the food on low
Take another a-a-a-a-a-a-Alka-Seltzer
Take another a-a-a-a-a-a-Alka-Seltzer

Hey, you know that I get heartburn
Sometimes indigestion
So Imma go take a Tums
Cause I don't want them seeing me queezy
I aint saying that it's bad for you
But just wait until the afternoon
When ulcers tearing your insi-i-i-ides
You'll wanna di-ie, ow!

Girl what you eatin?
Might just go vegan
But, cookout weekend!
Bacon;
I'm Achin'
How bad could it be if I ate one more?
Then two more plates, and my sphincter is torn
Acid Reflux-flux
Now I'm bout to throw up
No more time to spare
I jump out of my chair and run to the throne of porcelain (of porcelain)

Blame it on the food
There's something in this soup
Blame it on Ramón
That chef poisoned us both
Take another a-a-a-a-a-a-Alka-Seltzer
Take another a-a-a-a-a-a-Alka-Seltzer
Blame it on the brawt,
Blame it on the weenie,
Blame it on the fried chicken and the zucchinni
Take another a-a-a-a-a-a-Alka-Seltzer
Take another a-a-a-a-a-a-Alka-Seltzer

Oopsie!
I think I ate raw meat
Some Pepto should fix it
Of course my body don't agree
If meat keeps burning me, I'm gonna cry
No one knows what I'm going through
My cholesterol's through the roof
Must take perscription Pepcid fi-i-i-ive times before I can eat some curly fries

Girl what you eatin?
Don't wanna go vegan
Hamburger with cheese, and
Bacon;
I'm Achin'
Borderline obese, stomach uncontrolled
Just one more plate, intenstines will explode
Acid Reflux-flux
Now I'm bout to blow chunks
No more time to spare
I jump out of my chair and quell the fire of my intestines (my intestines)

Blame it on the food
The food is being rude
Blame it on mignon
Eaten to the bone
Take another a-a-a-a-a-a-Alka-Seltzer
Take another a-a-a-a-a-a-Alka-Seltzer
Blame it on the broth,
Blame the pepperoni,
Blame it on the porkchops and the MACARONI [whut? D:]
Take another a-a-a-a-a-a-Alka-Seltzer
Take another a-a-a-a-a-a-Alka-Seltzer

T-bones
Lord I do not feel gooood
This is just my luck
Couple more bites and my gut opens up
It's slipping...(diarrhea!)
Surely the chicken...(maybe the fajita)
Imma take a dose of Pepto
Rolaids didn't work, no
If it's going down it'll be kicking for who knows
Feel bad for my spleen
My pancreas has given up on me
So then we say ow, ow, ow
That must be the ham, I regret
And the beef, shouldn't have took a bite (I just couldn't fight)
Will be a long night (Learn to eat right)
They served me Shepher-ed's pie-ie-ie
And, man I got the hiccups,
Wish my stomach wall was thicker
Had to take a Nexium I just get sicker

Blame it on the food
Especially the stew
Blamin' Papa John
Wings felt like a bomb
Take another a-a-a-a-a-a-Alka-Seltzer
Take another a-a-a-a-a-a-Alka-Seltzer
Take another Tums,
Take another Zantac,
Take another Rolaid, Pepcid, and Prisolec
Take another a-a-a-a-a-a-Alka-Seltzer
Take another a-a-a-a-a-a-Alka-Seltzer (Plus)