You don't mean that
Ah, shit
So wha-a-a-ack
So wha-a-a-ack
No, don't
No, don't
No, don't

I'm embarrassed at your forced posing
Trying too hard to appea-eal
To the children and teens
No-one I know wears caps to the side
Get you hate agei-ing, trust me-e
But you look like a freak
Seems you have bad information
On what teens are embracing
So your attempt is failing, wow
So please, just pull up your pa-ants now
Before my blushing deepe-ens, quickly

You putz, you won't be down with the hip kids
You schmuck, you can't get down with the hip kids
Screwed up, doubt you'll be down with the hip kids
If you try to skate and run right into a tree
Wake up, you won't get down with the hip kids
You suck at this stuff, you won't be down with the hip kids
I'm honest, you suck at getting down with the hip kids
Practice will not help, you'll always look like a dweeb

I can't stand beside you, the slang words you're trying
Increases the shame that I fee-eel
You're related to me
"I'm hip and rad, fo' shizzle, so fly"
Wish you were messi-ing with me-e
But there's sincerity
Hate to be bursting your bubble
I don't want to be ageist
But this isn't you, face it now
Stop the beatboxing, act your age
I know you're old enough to reaso-on with me

You dunce, you won't be down with the hip kids
You putz, you can't get down with the hip kids
Screwed up, doubt you'll be down with the hip kids
If you wreck your face with another piercing spree
Shape up, you won't get down with the hip kids
You suck at this stuff, you won't be down with the hip kids
Obnoxious, you suck at getting down with the hip kids
Sandals aren't as hip as you ascribe them to be

You're not groovy
You're not funky
Don't say "homie"
Don't say "swag", please
No rapping, don't do that again
You're real bad at it
You're not a "cool boy"
It's really annoying, stop it
The way you wear ripped jeans, ow
They're not just ripped, they're really tiny cut-offs
They're ugly, they're blinding me, ow, ow
You're not becoming any more "hip"
That's the truth
Your youth is done, say goodbye
There's no need to force ev'ry try
You don't need to prolong this lie
Not gonna reclaim your lost youth this way, twit
Not true
It's quite pathetic
Don't want to see you hurt yourself with extreme sports
I mean, last I checked, you were pushing sixty
Don't want harm to come to you, right

So wha-a-a-ack
Please stop, you won't be down with the hip kids
Just stop, you can't get down with the hip kids
Don't want you to be down with the hip kids
Cause fads always fade and back to square one you'll be
Wake up, you won't get down with the hip kids
You suck at this stuff, you won't be down with the hip kids
Don't breakdance, you suck at getting down with the hip kids
Sadly, you're still cooler than me