When I get bored, there's somethin' I fall back on, it's true
Inside my home all alone, experiments to do
My kitchen has a space where I have things to place
Cram things down, cram right down, see what burns today
Random stuff shoved inside my toaster because
I want to see the results, the results, want 'em

Turn to max, watch it go, see what gets set alight
Whole internet will soon know what will happen when I
Stick my old flip-flop deep inside
Jam bad books in there tonight

Sometimes it's hard, lots of times when the fire just grows
Though when nothin' at all happens, that still blows
I'm here to test a phrase, that's "top of the line"
If they're sold like that, all things should work out fine
We shall see if it's truth or plain bunk
Once I toast my NERF gun, my NERF gun, watch it

House ain't burnin' down, won't be burnin' down
At least not for a seventh time, cause I'm prepared
Let's find out what happens when I
Squeeze a pear in, set to high
Might test socks next time, I'm down
Will they blow? Or just turn brown?

Hell, I might just go mad next time
And stick inside there a bread slice