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Song Parodies -> "Bored-Ass Man"
Original Song Title:
"Candyman"
(MP3)Original Performer:
Christina Aguilera
Parody Song Title:
"Bored-Ass Man"
Parody Written by:
the_conqueror_of_parodies
The Lyrics
Ever had one of those nights when you had absolutely nothing to do? So has this guy (and me, but who cares about me?...
(I could watch grass grow 'till it's half past five)
Bored-ass man, bored-ass man
(Stare at what's for lunch, just in case it comes to life)
I'm just so bored-ass, man
Heeyyyyy
I'm home all by myself on a Friday night
And once again I've nothing going on tonight
I might throw cupcakes against the wall
BUt then again, I could go bowling at the mall
Yes, I've got no life, but I am at fault
I'm a wall starin', finger twiddlin' bored-ass man
A dart throwin', overeatin' bored-ass man
Ooh, yaaaayy
Might try to make a coffee cup from bamboo shoots and vines
Might chug champagne, then try to tell the time
Could try to find the diff'rence between chips and fries (Like chips and fries)
There's no one online that I could chat to all night
Pretend I'm in fog, pretend I'm a dog
I'm a wall-drawin', paper-foldin' bored-ass man
A web-surfin', beanbag-loungin' bored-ass man
(Scatting)
Hey, yeah
Yeeeeeaaay
Oh yeah, sit around!
I could scratch my balls, could run into walls
I'm a knife-throwin', baseball-jugglin' bored-ass man
A fork-combin', smoke pipe-blowin' bored-ass man
Whoa, yeah
Throwing pens around, one made a little dot
Right there on the wall, although it's hard to spot
I try to scrub that dot away (oh)
What a way to waste a day
(Look at my watch, and it is Saturday)
Bored-ass man, bored-ass man
(Still got nothin' on, gotta waste another day)
Bored-ass man, bored-ass man
Watch 'I, Robot', throwin' pots, make myself a lollipop
(I am so bored-ass, man)
Listen to pop, flip and flop, make balloons go pop
(I'm just so bored-ass, man)
Drink a juice box, drop it like it's hot, maybe smoke pot
(Yes, maybe)
Learn all the names of hurricanes
Fill my pants with codfish bait
Found a big bee hive, throw things at it (ow!)
I'm a glass-eatin', bottle-throwin' bored-ass man
(So bored) A cake-eatin', table-smashin' bored-ass man
(Bored) A fire-startin', window-breakin' bored-ass man
A ball-bouncin', fridge-explodin' bored-ass man
Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooyeeeeaaaaaaayoooh
Bored-ass man, bored-ass man
Bored-ass man, bored-ass man
Bored-ass man, bored-ass man
(I'll get all the food that I found in the fridge)
He'll get all the food that he found in the fridge
(Jam it in the blender and set the thing to Mix)
Shove it in the blender, and watch the seconds tick
(Now it is done, will it taste well?)
Now it is done, it tastes like hell!
(Threw the bowl away, and it smashed on the wall)
This is what he does, he knows no-one at all!
Bored-ass man, bored-ass man
(Stare at what's for lunch, just in case it comes to life)
I'm just so bored-ass, man
Heeyyyyy
I'm home all by myself on a Friday night
And once again I've nothing going on tonight
I might throw cupcakes against the wall
BUt then again, I could go bowling at the mall
Yes, I've got no life, but I am at fault
I'm a wall starin', finger twiddlin' bored-ass man
A dart throwin', overeatin' bored-ass man
Ooh, yaaaayy
Might try to make a coffee cup from bamboo shoots and vines
Might chug champagne, then try to tell the time
Could try to find the diff'rence between chips and fries (Like chips and fries)
There's no one online that I could chat to all night
Pretend I'm in fog, pretend I'm a dog
I'm a wall-drawin', paper-foldin' bored-ass man
A web-surfin', beanbag-loungin' bored-ass man
(Scatting)
Hey, yeah
Yeeeeeaaay
Oh yeah, sit around!
I could scratch my balls, could run into walls
I'm a knife-throwin', baseball-jugglin' bored-ass man
A fork-combin', smoke pipe-blowin' bored-ass man
Whoa, yeah
Throwing pens around, one made a little dot
Right there on the wall, although it's hard to spot
I try to scrub that dot away (oh)
What a way to waste a day
(Look at my watch, and it is Saturday)
Bored-ass man, bored-ass man
(Still got nothin' on, gotta waste another day)
Bored-ass man, bored-ass man
Watch 'I, Robot', throwin' pots, make myself a lollipop
(I am so bored-ass, man)
Listen to pop, flip and flop, make balloons go pop
(I'm just so bored-ass, man)
Drink a juice box, drop it like it's hot, maybe smoke pot
(Yes, maybe)
Learn all the names of hurricanes
Fill my pants with codfish bait
Found a big bee hive, throw things at it (ow!)
I'm a glass-eatin', bottle-throwin' bored-ass man
(So bored) A cake-eatin', table-smashin' bored-ass man
(Bored) A fire-startin', window-breakin' bored-ass man
A ball-bouncin', fridge-explodin' bored-ass man
Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooyeeeeaaaaaaayoooh
Bored-ass man, bored-ass man
Bored-ass man, bored-ass man
Bored-ass man, bored-ass man
(I'll get all the food that I found in the fridge)
He'll get all the food that he found in the fridge
(Jam it in the blender and set the thing to Mix)
Shove it in the blender, and watch the seconds tick
(Now it is done, will it taste well?)
Now it is done, it tastes like hell!
(Threw the bowl away, and it smashed on the wall)
This is what he does, he knows no-one at all!
Yeah.
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 2 | 2 | 2 | ||||||||
| 5 | 2 | 2 | 2 |
User Comments
Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.
Sir, at least your eatin' cake . . . that's always a happy sign!
(ABC) Not bad, but definitely not one of your best. The pacing was great, but it lacked a little funny that I'm used to seeing in all of your parodies. I can tell this one's a little older, you've come a long way in your writing since then. Good, but I'm know you have better. 544
(ABC) Many Ughs and Grunts of laughter!
(ABC) I don't understand why you didnt enter this one in the Artistry round, it would have been a high placer!
(ABC) Great work! I really like the different descriptions before "bored-ass man" (wall-starin', fire-startin'). And it took me a couple time to actually get through your parody...not your fault, but because the link went to the actual video and I got distracted haha. Nice work!
I have mixed opinions on this one Conq. . .I think it was good, and I loved the line "Could try to find the diff'rence between chips and fries" because with you being from Australia, and knowing that chips=fries. . .it made that line funny, though I had to do a double take, I also felt it started losing steam towards the end, so mixed opinion, overall positive though:)
The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.
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