I'm feelin' kinda bored, let's waste some time
With a fun board game
Which one? Not choosy
Lookin', uh, hell of a lot here to choose from
Way too many options
(Dunno, I'd be fine with any of these games)
They're all awesome, yeah
(Yeah, they're pretty good
Think we might need Eenie Meenie Miney Mo? Your call)
I'll just grab one blindly (okay)
Here goes, a random game
Looks like we got Risk (can we not play that game, please?)
Buck up, give it a go
Risk is cool (argh)

Hey
I'm buildin' giant armies (giant armies)
In Risk, Risk (Risk, Risk)
Roll the dice and they'll decide who wins, you or me
Please play it with me (play it with me)
Don't be a dick, Dick (Risk, Risk)
You may not like this game, fine, that I can see
Hey
Gotta have one more player (one more player)
For Risk, Risk (Risk, Risk)
Though I tried to look online for one-dude rules, see
I came up empty (came up empty)
Yes, I found zip, zip (Risk, Risk)
Please change your mind, this game's fine, play it with me

All the continents, I gotta have 'em (ah-ooh)
The yellow pieces are mine, I'll let you have the black ones (ah-ooh)
Or would you prefer to use green?
Doesn't matter, let's start plannin' (ah-ooh)
It's just us two, so 40 dudes each
Soldiers, horses and cannons
I like the cannons, cannons (aaaaaaaaaa-ooh!)
Roll for who goes first (ooh!)
It's you, you're lucky (ooh!)
Spread your infantry (ooh!)
Out nice and even (ah-ooh)
And then we will see
Who's gonna take over the whole boa-oa-oard
Six continents, it's o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-on

Hey
We're takin' over countries (over countries)
In Risk, Risk (Risk, Risk)
Rollin' dice, cause they'll decide who owns New Guinea
Who's role was higher? (Role was higher)
Again, you win, win (Risk, Risk)
Brazil's not mine, though next time we roll, we'll see
Hey
Who's takin' Indonesia (Indonesia)
In Risk, Risk (Risk, Risk)
Tradin' my cards in for nine more units, easy
Not gonna beat me (gonna beat me)
No, you won't win, win (Risk, Risk)
The world is mine, roll your dice, you'll lose to me (woah-ooh)

Now it's my turn, buddy, I'm pickin' a nation to move my dudes in, see
More territ'ry for my tiny plastic world-conquerin' army
'Twill be mine, usin' three dice
I'll be the king, can't beat me-e, ju-ust try-y (try-y) (aaaaaaaaaa-ooh!)
This won't be your world (ooh!)
Ain't no point in' (ooh!)
Facin' me (ooh!)
Cause I'm stompin' (ah-ooh)
All over you-ou, see
Unless you can get a higher ro-o-o-o-oll
You just did? That blo-o-ows

Hey
Not gonna let you beat me (let you beat me)
In Risk, Risk (Risk, Risk) (eh)
You heard right, this world is mine (eh-eh), won't take it from me
So fear my army (fear my army) (yeah-eah-eah)
They're gonna kick, kick (Risk, Risk)
Your scrawny hind in due time, take it from meeeeee-e-e-e-e-e yeah
Hey
Tryin' to kill your armies (kill your armies)
In Risk, Risk (Risk, Risk)
I say "try" because I die, the hell's wrong with me?
I should be better (should be better)
Swear I'm not shit, shit (Risk, Risk) (eh)
And though I try, I'm still shite (eh), you're killin' me
(Ay, ay, ay, ay)

Bud, what does it take to kill you
Thought you'd suck, suck, suck, suck
Since you say you hate this game so much, much, much, much-much
Thought I'd take you down, but instead it seems I've found
You're the best around, crown you Risk King, bud, bud, bud, bud (yeah)
Why didn't you tell me (yeah), that at Risk you're awesome (yeah)
Make it look easy (yeah), so what's the problem
With Risk please? Just tell me
Why you get annoyed, ah-ah-oh-ah-ah-ah-ooh-whee

Hey
When I ask about playin' (about playin') (oh-oh-ho)
Some Risk, Risk (Risk, Risk)
Tell me why cause in my eyes (ooh-whoa-oh-oh-oh) you're the best I've seen (ooh-ooh-ooh)
Makes no sense to me (no sense to me)
Why would you miss, miss (Risk, Risk)
Don't mean to pry, just say why (here's why) you hate Risk, please
Hey
You say you find it boring (find it boring) (meh-eh)
Hate Risk, Risk (Risk, Risk) (yeah-eah)
Waste of time, no girl or guy can beat you, I see (now you can see-ee, buddy)
That makes sense to me (makes sense to me)
I'll let you pick, pick (Risk, Risk) (new game)
A new game, I do not mind (fresh round) which, surprise me
Yeah-eah-ee-yeah-eah-eah-eah-eah-eah-eah

That's just fine, not much of a Risk fan, you know
Twas too eager to play games (oh yeah, yeah-eah)
Which game do you wanna play, man?
I don't care which game you pick (you sure? Gonna pinky-swear on it?)
Pinky-swear (hah), pick a game now (yo), can't see how I'd throw a fit

Pick a game, my boy (ay) that brings you joy (ay)
Quick, my boy (ay) 'fore I'm annoyed
Hungry Hippos? Oy (can't complain', man), that saps my joy
(You give me boring, I give you clacky noise, dude)
Say it's vengeance? Had that one comin', oy
(Said you'd play my choice game)
This blows
(Fair? From me? Hell no, yeah-ah)